First, my reasons for marrying..

Ok. So, I'm going to be a little bit busy this weekend.

Turns out I have this wedding to go to.

Mine!

Brett and I will be getting married at 5:00 on Saturday at the Church of the Land at Living History Farms in Urbandale, Iowa.

I've had a lot on my mind with the new job, the move and planning the details of the wedding, but I've also been trying to keep in mind the reasons behind all this big stuff.

I've thought about what a wedding is and what it means. I've looked at the historic customs of marraige and tried to make them coincide with the modern expectations of marraige. I've considered my identity and how marraige can and will change it. I've thought about my specific relationship and what makes me confident that I can honestly vow to commit to it for a lifetime. I've looked at my husband-to-be and thought about what it will be like to see him next to me for the rest of my life.

Because that's what's important.

We will wear our finery, a beautiful cream dress and a custom-made grey suit, and it will be an outward expression of our inner joy, a symbol of starting fresh, and a sign of our respect for each other and the sacrament we're partaking in.

We'll exchange wedding bands, mine of simple gold so I can wear it every single day, his of titanium and meteorite, durable and rare, and our families and friends will bless them. Rather than being passive societal witnesses, our friends and family will have the chance to participate in our ceremony, to make their own vow to support our marraige and help it thrive.

I'm thrilled about the pretty calico bunting my mom made to decorate the church. But what makes it important to me is the care that my Mom took in creating it, that it's fabric and hand made and unique and will make me think of her when I look back at pictures.

I can't wait to taste the carved baron of beef and the garlic mashed potatoes. But what we're really doing is marking the first time my husband and I feed our friends and family together.

When we cut into the baseball-and-yarn-shaped cake and share it with each other, what we're really doing is representing the sweetness of life, the things we love, and how sharing those things with each other is our responsibility to our marraige and our great pleasure.

All those little details that I've worked so hard to coordinate and plan will tell our guests who we are as a couple and who we would like to be: unfussy, traditional, fun, creative, steadfast, generous, loving, happy.

It's about finding blissful happiness with another person and seeing it side by side with complete frustration and still knowing that you want to share your life with them. It's about bringing the strength of family and friends to help you keep that commitment. It's about celebrating love and life and happiness. What could be a better way to spend a weekend than that?